I know that fostering independence is healthy for kids, just as I know that they don't need me every single second of the day. Which means that technically I have time to read a few pages or exercise for a bit. Maybe I need to get my priorities straight, but I can't seem to find that time anywhere, and believe me, I've looked. It's not just sitting around waiting for me. If I can't find the time though, at least I can make the time. It's an extension of the yoga idea you do while holding your baby. I have tried this too by the way, but both my kids were too squirmy to find their zen.
To find time to do the things I want, I have found that it's really quite simple to include my children.. This doesn't exactly qualify as "me time," and some activities need to be tweaked a little to work, but it's the easiest cheat I know of.
There was a time when I devoted over an hour, six nights a week, to exercise. I lost over 70 pounds and was a size 8 for two weeks. Then I got pregnant with Eddie. And I gained 50 of those pounds back and I'm sure many mothers can relate. Now with two children, I am not quite so motivated to spend my evening time working out, so I have to fit it in when my kids are up.
I don't even bother to set them up with toys. I give Jimmy a weight or something, and put Eddie in the front row of the audience. Then I get down to it. I alternate with jumping jacks, karate kicks, lunges, squats, and situps. These are the best exercises, because as well as effectively toning and making me tired in five minutes or less, they also look completely ridiculous. Jimmy is happy to imitate me, and Eddie thinks it's his own private comedy show. Everyone's happy.
Now for that book I've been meaning to get to for weeks. The one I've picked up several times to read the first page and put down again, because someone needs a diaper change or a game of Go Fish. The best way to get to the second page is to haul out the train tracks. There are four and half years difference between Jimmy and Eddie, but they both play with the same train set. This can keep Jimmy amused for hours, and Eddie will sit for maybe ten minutes, putting the trains on the track. Voila! I may even get a chapter finished (if I'm quick).
There are a couple other tricks, but they are more age specific and won't work on both at the same time. If Eddie is napping, I will challenge Jimmy to complete something in x amount of time, like a puzzle or writing a sentence that he comes up with himself. If Jimmy is in school, I can put Eddie in his high chair with his own puzzle or some blocks to play with. These techniques only last about five minutes, but when I need a breather, it's enough.
Now for all of you who drink coffee, I hope your kids let you. Eddie has tried coffee before and loves it. I need at least two coffees a day (usually four), and I cannot drink it anywhere Eddie can see me. So I have to act like an addict sneaking a hit to get it. The coffee cup hides behind the microwave. I will then get Eddie to look away while I run into the kitchen and guzzle as much as I can. I'm sorry, but I don't have advice for anyone who wants a coffee break.
So by the end of the day, if I add together all my free time while the kids are up, I get about half an hour. Sometimes it's less, and sometimes it's more. I don't want to have too much time to myself though. Right now the boys want to spend time with me and I enjoy them. I'm going to wake up one day and they'll be teenagers and want nothing to do with me. I probably won't enjoy them as much then either. So half an hour's good enough.
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