As my early readers know, I am careful about what food I let J and E eat. I know there are certain things that cause them problems and was avoiding certain colours and additives. What I didn't know was that there were so many. I was avoiding most heavily processed snacks and junk food and J was still having trouble listening and paying attention at times. So I looked things up. I love Google. Here's some surprising things that I didn't know, that might enlighten other parents.
Common triggers for behavioural problems are not just found in junk food and juice, or even processed snacks like cookies and cereal bars. Most yogourt, bread, soup and crackers contain these things as well. Alternative milk, like soy and rice milk contain these things too. And oatmeal. That's right, oatmeal! I didn't know people put additives in oatmeal but apparently they do. Which leads me to conclude that most children with gluten-allergies aren't necessarily allergic to gluten, but to all the processed additives that go with it. Crazy.
Anyway, this is just a short note on something I found surprising. I will post a link to the site with all the additives and food colourings that I found later.
Addendum: These foods don't have to be eliminated completely, just monitored and reduced if needed.
Monday, 29 April 2013
Saturday, 27 April 2013
Deadline time!
I will be posting less often for the next couple of weeks because I have an article to finish. My deadline is months away, but I lost all my research and have to start again so I've given myself a personal deadline of next Sunday to have the middle draft done. By middle draft I mean almost final, but it gives me time to go over it every week or so to make it perfect. So my writing time will be mostly focused on that for the next little bit.
Here are some tips to keep everyone happy while I'm taking a semi-break from mom-blogging:
Add puffed rice (the cereal) to all of your baking. It can be substituted for half the oatmeal in a recipe if you run out, or just add it to bars or cookies to increase the yield.
When you buy lasagne noodles, get the oven-ready kind. Believe me, it's a pain to boil it before you assemble it.
I figured out a wonderful way to clean any drink spills from a high chair tray. Instead of soak, squeeze, rinse and repeat with a cloth, use a syringe and a cup. It's much quicker and also amuses the kids. Depending on how clean the tray was before, the kids can even drink it up after it's cleaned. That's up to your discretion.
Find the most interesting window in your house and put a comfy chair beside it. Kids love being nosy (I'm not one to judge, I love our huge window), so you can sit comfortably and point out what's going on when it's a rainy day or too early to go outside.
Try the healthy adult cereal for your kids. Some brands taste exactly like kids' favourites, but are all-natural, high-protein and low sugar. A really great one, the maple flavoured Honey Bunches of Oats.
That's all my advice for now. I will continue to post, but not as regularly for a while.
Here are some tips to keep everyone happy while I'm taking a semi-break from mom-blogging:
Add puffed rice (the cereal) to all of your baking. It can be substituted for half the oatmeal in a recipe if you run out, or just add it to bars or cookies to increase the yield.
When you buy lasagne noodles, get the oven-ready kind. Believe me, it's a pain to boil it before you assemble it.
I figured out a wonderful way to clean any drink spills from a high chair tray. Instead of soak, squeeze, rinse and repeat with a cloth, use a syringe and a cup. It's much quicker and also amuses the kids. Depending on how clean the tray was before, the kids can even drink it up after it's cleaned. That's up to your discretion.
Find the most interesting window in your house and put a comfy chair beside it. Kids love being nosy (I'm not one to judge, I love our huge window), so you can sit comfortably and point out what's going on when it's a rainy day or too early to go outside.
Try the healthy adult cereal for your kids. Some brands taste exactly like kids' favourites, but are all-natural, high-protein and low sugar. A really great one, the maple flavoured Honey Bunches of Oats.
That's all my advice for now. I will continue to post, but not as regularly for a while.
I can't believe some people!
As I've noted before, I don't like gratuitous punctuation and showy sentences, but I had to add that exclamation mark and I will tell you why. I was going to the gym yesterday because I've decided it's finally time to get back into shape. I go at the time there's a free drop-in gym for J so he can get some exercise too, and I put E in daycare for 40 minutes (it's not bad, but I still feel guilty). The bus schedule means that we get there 2o minutes before J's class, so to save time (and daycare minutes) I decided to take the boys in the change room with me and get ready for my workout before I dropped them off.
Now it's posted that the facility prefers children go into the family change room, and I always thought that meant for kids who were changing. I tried to take them in there, but it's a coed change room and all the private rooms were full, so I took them into the women's room with me. They weren't changing anyway and people take kids in there all the time. Besides, they are young and don't really care about naked people.
Well, I went in and immediately a ninety-year old lady started yelling at me. She told me it's a woman's change room and there were NO BOYS ALLOWED FOR GOD"S SAKE! That's a direct quote, as is this: "Some women prance around here totally naked and boys shouldn't see that! They need to leave."
Now there were many things I could have said to her that weren't nice, but I am trying very hard to be nice this year so all I told her was J's six and he isn't in there to look at anything. I also told her the other change room was full and I would be ten seconds (I had to change my pants, that's it that's all). She still had a problem so I finally told J to wait for me right outside the door while I changed on the other side of the door, giving everyone a bit of a show whenever it opened. I was going to stay close to him, so I do apologize to any readers who may have saw me pantsless. It's a small price to pay for not being the cause of a grouchy old lady's heart attack.
The icing on the cake was as soon as I left the change room, another woman went in with her five-year old son and the old lady didn't say a word. That may be due to the fact that every other woman in there went up to her and told her she was being "stupid/ridiculous/mean/unfair/etc." Again, direct quotes because I didnt't use any of those words. It was clear that she was the only one bothered by it.
J was very upset about the whole matter, and the only reason I left him outside was because I was unsure of the gym's rules for kids in the change room. I asked right after the episode what the rules are, and they said to take him with me. He is only six and they'd much rather deal with cranky people than have a child left unattended. It took a lot of explaining to him that sometimes people are just like that and nothing was his fault. At the end of the day though, he knew that just because some people are mean and ornery doesn't mean we change who we are. He told me the next time he sees that lady he's going to tell her to have a nice day, because it's better than what she was having and maybe it would help.
Although it's an important lesson (perhaps not only for children), I still feel horrible about having to leave him outside the door. A very nice lady stayed with him and I was less than a foot away at the other side of the door, but I wonder if I should have done something different. I don't want to back away from anything, especially when it comes to my children, but I was embarrassed that she was making such a scene and just thought it was easier. Besides, I definitely would have run out there without pants in a second if he was in trouble!
I'm not sure what the point of this post is really. Maybe it's to admit that I could have handled the situation better. Maybe I made a split-second decision that wasn't the best. Maybe I am just writing because it made me so angry I want to share it. Maybe there's really no pint of relating this at all, but it does have to do with parenting and now that I know the rules of the facility, it will definitely not happen again. I will stand up to anyone who wants J to stay out, and they can deal with the consequences, not me. I do know that I have to let it go too, like I told J.
End note: E stayed in the change room with me while J was leaning against the door trying to get through by osmosis.
Now it's posted that the facility prefers children go into the family change room, and I always thought that meant for kids who were changing. I tried to take them in there, but it's a coed change room and all the private rooms were full, so I took them into the women's room with me. They weren't changing anyway and people take kids in there all the time. Besides, they are young and don't really care about naked people.
Well, I went in and immediately a ninety-year old lady started yelling at me. She told me it's a woman's change room and there were NO BOYS ALLOWED FOR GOD"S SAKE! That's a direct quote, as is this: "Some women prance around here totally naked and boys shouldn't see that! They need to leave."
Now there were many things I could have said to her that weren't nice, but I am trying very hard to be nice this year so all I told her was J's six and he isn't in there to look at anything. I also told her the other change room was full and I would be ten seconds (I had to change my pants, that's it that's all). She still had a problem so I finally told J to wait for me right outside the door while I changed on the other side of the door, giving everyone a bit of a show whenever it opened. I was going to stay close to him, so I do apologize to any readers who may have saw me pantsless. It's a small price to pay for not being the cause of a grouchy old lady's heart attack.
The icing on the cake was as soon as I left the change room, another woman went in with her five-year old son and the old lady didn't say a word. That may be due to the fact that every other woman in there went up to her and told her she was being "stupid/ridiculous/mean/unfair/etc." Again, direct quotes because I didnt't use any of those words. It was clear that she was the only one bothered by it.
J was very upset about the whole matter, and the only reason I left him outside was because I was unsure of the gym's rules for kids in the change room. I asked right after the episode what the rules are, and they said to take him with me. He is only six and they'd much rather deal with cranky people than have a child left unattended. It took a lot of explaining to him that sometimes people are just like that and nothing was his fault. At the end of the day though, he knew that just because some people are mean and ornery doesn't mean we change who we are. He told me the next time he sees that lady he's going to tell her to have a nice day, because it's better than what she was having and maybe it would help.
Although it's an important lesson (perhaps not only for children), I still feel horrible about having to leave him outside the door. A very nice lady stayed with him and I was less than a foot away at the other side of the door, but I wonder if I should have done something different. I don't want to back away from anything, especially when it comes to my children, but I was embarrassed that she was making such a scene and just thought it was easier. Besides, I definitely would have run out there without pants in a second if he was in trouble!
I'm not sure what the point of this post is really. Maybe it's to admit that I could have handled the situation better. Maybe I made a split-second decision that wasn't the best. Maybe I am just writing because it made me so angry I want to share it. Maybe there's really no pint of relating this at all, but it does have to do with parenting and now that I know the rules of the facility, it will definitely not happen again. I will stand up to anyone who wants J to stay out, and they can deal with the consequences, not me. I do know that I have to let it go too, like I told J.
End note: E stayed in the change room with me while J was leaning against the door trying to get through by osmosis.
Tuesday, 23 April 2013
Mornings
There are people you see everywhere without kids, but you just know they have to be moms. It's the way they reach to help you when a toddler runs off, or the sympathetic look while your kid is having a public meltdown. Then there are the people who have obviously never had or been around a child in their lives. These are the ones who wonder why you're feeding your child a yogourt tube on the bus or singing the Itsy Bitsy Spider where everyone can hear you. They're also the ones who judge you for always being late and running for the city bus, only to catch it in your driveway because the bus driver is awesome.
To those people I say, you have no idea! Really. Moms (and dads), imagine something normal you used to do that took five seconds or less, like putting on your coat. Now add ten minutes for every child you have, plus another four for yourself, and that's how long it takes now. So for me, putting on my coat takes 24 minutes (and five seconds), because I have two children.
Let's elaborate on the coat thing. Mornings are fun around here, especially on school days. There are 90 minutes from the time J gets up to the time he needs to be at the bus stop. Anyone without children would think that's plenty of time to have breakfast, brush teeth, put a lunch in his bag and get a coat and shoes on. But it's 45 minutes of repeating, "Sit down and finish your food," before he actually does. It's about 20 minutes of find the lunch bag, because of course there are distractions. The lunch bag has been found in places like the snack cupboard, the bathroom, under the table, and outside, to name a few. The coat and the shoes is where the raised voices come in. Not because I'm angry, but because it's the only way to keep his attention at this point. Every school day is the same, with us rushign out teh door just minutes before the bus comes.
I'm not saying that J doesn't listen well in general. He's pretty good for his age, until we're on a deadline. Then I think his ears fall off or something, because nothing gets through. And remember, I have a toddler running around stuffing food in his own ears and putting everyone's shoes on but his own. So I conclude that an hour and a half is not nearly enough time to get one kid ready for school. Maybe E's been stuffing food in J's ears when I'm not looking; that would explain a lot.
Some end notes: Non-parents, please do not judge any parent for being almost-late for everything. Parents, if your kids can be ready for school in under an hour, I applaud you. And city bus drivers, thank you for stopping like you did today because you thought we were late again. We were running for the school bus today, but it's nice to know you care.
To those people I say, you have no idea! Really. Moms (and dads), imagine something normal you used to do that took five seconds or less, like putting on your coat. Now add ten minutes for every child you have, plus another four for yourself, and that's how long it takes now. So for me, putting on my coat takes 24 minutes (and five seconds), because I have two children.
Let's elaborate on the coat thing. Mornings are fun around here, especially on school days. There are 90 minutes from the time J gets up to the time he needs to be at the bus stop. Anyone without children would think that's plenty of time to have breakfast, brush teeth, put a lunch in his bag and get a coat and shoes on. But it's 45 minutes of repeating, "Sit down and finish your food," before he actually does. It's about 20 minutes of find the lunch bag, because of course there are distractions. The lunch bag has been found in places like the snack cupboard, the bathroom, under the table, and outside, to name a few. The coat and the shoes is where the raised voices come in. Not because I'm angry, but because it's the only way to keep his attention at this point. Every school day is the same, with us rushign out teh door just minutes before the bus comes.
I'm not saying that J doesn't listen well in general. He's pretty good for his age, until we're on a deadline. Then I think his ears fall off or something, because nothing gets through. And remember, I have a toddler running around stuffing food in his own ears and putting everyone's shoes on but his own. So I conclude that an hour and a half is not nearly enough time to get one kid ready for school. Maybe E's been stuffing food in J's ears when I'm not looking; that would explain a lot.
Some end notes: Non-parents, please do not judge any parent for being almost-late for everything. Parents, if your kids can be ready for school in under an hour, I applaud you. And city bus drivers, thank you for stopping like you did today because you thought we were late again. We were running for the school bus today, but it's nice to know you care.
Sunday, 21 April 2013
Poor Judgment
I'm going to keep this one short because I'm tired and my brain is shutting down. I just wanted to comment on poor parenting judgment. We all have it some days. It's okay to admit it. I forgive you. As long as it's not something that's a total lack of common sense and puts someone in danger or makes them sick, then I forgive you. Let me tell you about my latest lapse in judgment.
We were out to buy a new bike for J, since he's outgrown his old one. While we were at the store, my husband saw a cool little bike for E. It was just his size and had no pedals, so it was great for him to get around on. He hopped on, said, "beep beep," and started for the doors. He was in no way going to leave that thing behind.
Enter mental lapse: Why did I ever let him take that thing out of the store? He learned how to ru last week, and he was already going fast enough. Then I agreed to give him wheels. Maybe it was because he was just so cute riding around the store, or maybe it was because I asked my husband what he thought about it, and both of those are forgivable in normal circumstances. But to give a bike to a toddler whose only goal is to go anywhere fast.....
So now every time E sees a window or door, he sings, "Bide bide bide bide!" And every time we do go outside he's off and running for that thing and then off and rolling down the sidewalk as fast as his short little legs can take him. Come to think of it, his speed and size really do defy physics. And then there's J zipping up and down past and around us both (he got a really cool bike too), while I'm running after the one of them and shouting after the other one. I think I'm going to petition for a fenced sidewalk. Or maybe I'll make little stop signs that say, "STOP, now listen to your mother and turn around."
Maybe I need a course in how to do favours for myself. But I look at how happy E is on that little thing and I can't regret it. Mostly. He'll be too big for it next year and then it's going to my niece, unless my sister refuses (which she will if she's smart). Summer can't be that long, right? And if this doesn't help me burn calories.....But still, poor judgment.
We were out to buy a new bike for J, since he's outgrown his old one. While we were at the store, my husband saw a cool little bike for E. It was just his size and had no pedals, so it was great for him to get around on. He hopped on, said, "beep beep," and started for the doors. He was in no way going to leave that thing behind.
Enter mental lapse: Why did I ever let him take that thing out of the store? He learned how to ru last week, and he was already going fast enough. Then I agreed to give him wheels. Maybe it was because he was just so cute riding around the store, or maybe it was because I asked my husband what he thought about it, and both of those are forgivable in normal circumstances. But to give a bike to a toddler whose only goal is to go anywhere fast.....
So now every time E sees a window or door, he sings, "Bide bide bide bide!" And every time we do go outside he's off and running for that thing and then off and rolling down the sidewalk as fast as his short little legs can take him. Come to think of it, his speed and size really do defy physics. And then there's J zipping up and down past and around us both (he got a really cool bike too), while I'm running after the one of them and shouting after the other one. I think I'm going to petition for a fenced sidewalk. Or maybe I'll make little stop signs that say, "STOP, now listen to your mother and turn around."
Maybe I need a course in how to do favours for myself. But I look at how happy E is on that little thing and I can't regret it. Mostly. He'll be too big for it next year and then it's going to my niece, unless my sister refuses (which she will if she's smart). Summer can't be that long, right? And if this doesn't help me burn calories.....But still, poor judgment.
Mom's tired
It's been a crazy weekend. I won't bore you with details. Sorry, yes I will. It started on Friday, as weekends usually do. I had the crazy before-dinner hour, when the kids are temporarily insane because they're hungry, tired, cranky, demanding and miserable. This is also the hour I need to think about dinner, so it doesn't really work out some days. I don't blame the kids; everyone has an afternoon slump. It could be better timing, but that's why I like make-ahead meals and slow cooker recipes. Friday though, I had to make dinner at "the time."
Once the kids were fed, I bundled them up to go and buy a birthday present for J's friend. That's when my friend called, and asked me to come over for a TV piece about her cloth diapering business. We still had to get the gift and I hadn't washed my hair and she needed me in forty minutes. I said yes though, because she's awesome and I wanted to help. So off we went for the quickest gift selection ever (in and out of the store in four minutes) and then to my friend's house for a television appearance. I did manage to brush my hair before leaving, so that counts for something, right? E was on TV too, as the cutest diaper model ever. I got the kids to bed over an hour late that night, and we woke up Saturday to the calm before the storm.
I had two coffees and played with the kids and then we had to go. I dropped J and daddy off to J's sports class, then took E across town to the mall to change his diaper (we were in the Great Cloth Diaper Change), then drove back to pick up the athletic one. We stopped at home to get the present we'd forgotten, then daddy dropped J off at his party while I gave E lunch and cleaned the kitchen. Then I put E down for a nap and went grocery shopping, leaving daddy on the quiet home front. E woke up as soon as we were done putting the groceries away, and I went to pick up J. Then we played inside (it was snowing in late April) for the rest of the day. After the kids went to bed I cleaned up and watched a movie and passed out.
Today was a bit slower. I woke up and had two coffees (this is what I do every day), and did the breakfast/hygiene/playtime thing. Then E had an early nap because he was exhausted, so I had a chance to bake all the treats I promised for J. I made banana bread, muffins, and a truck load of homemade bear paws. Then E woke up and J's friend came over for a visit. Since it wasn't snowing today, I took them all to the park and chased E around the play structure for two hours while J and his friend played Nerf gun tag. By the time J's friend left at five, I was thoroughly wiped.
Now the kids are in bed and I am updating my blogs for my loyal fans and followers. The point is not that I flatter myself! I was planning to work on my assigned article and edit some stories I've written, but it's past 9 pm and my head hurts. So I'm going to try, but I doubt I'll make much of a dent in my workload. I know it's been said before, but I'm going to emphasize here that children take a lot of work! It's weekends like this one that bring that message home. It's the best work in the world though, and I had a blast. Needless to say, I wouldn't change a thing. Except maybe my noisy neighbours who have kept me up all week.
Mostly unrelated but still relevant: Check it out! I'm on TV!
http://www.chextv.com/news/ln/13-04-19/Cloth_diapers_vs_Disposables.aspx
Once the kids were fed, I bundled them up to go and buy a birthday present for J's friend. That's when my friend called, and asked me to come over for a TV piece about her cloth diapering business. We still had to get the gift and I hadn't washed my hair and she needed me in forty minutes. I said yes though, because she's awesome and I wanted to help. So off we went for the quickest gift selection ever (in and out of the store in four minutes) and then to my friend's house for a television appearance. I did manage to brush my hair before leaving, so that counts for something, right? E was on TV too, as the cutest diaper model ever. I got the kids to bed over an hour late that night, and we woke up Saturday to the calm before the storm.
I had two coffees and played with the kids and then we had to go. I dropped J and daddy off to J's sports class, then took E across town to the mall to change his diaper (we were in the Great Cloth Diaper Change), then drove back to pick up the athletic one. We stopped at home to get the present we'd forgotten, then daddy dropped J off at his party while I gave E lunch and cleaned the kitchen. Then I put E down for a nap and went grocery shopping, leaving daddy on the quiet home front. E woke up as soon as we were done putting the groceries away, and I went to pick up J. Then we played inside (it was snowing in late April) for the rest of the day. After the kids went to bed I cleaned up and watched a movie and passed out.
Today was a bit slower. I woke up and had two coffees (this is what I do every day), and did the breakfast/hygiene/playtime thing. Then E had an early nap because he was exhausted, so I had a chance to bake all the treats I promised for J. I made banana bread, muffins, and a truck load of homemade bear paws. Then E woke up and J's friend came over for a visit. Since it wasn't snowing today, I took them all to the park and chased E around the play structure for two hours while J and his friend played Nerf gun tag. By the time J's friend left at five, I was thoroughly wiped.
Now the kids are in bed and I am updating my blogs for my loyal fans and followers. The point is not that I flatter myself! I was planning to work on my assigned article and edit some stories I've written, but it's past 9 pm and my head hurts. So I'm going to try, but I doubt I'll make much of a dent in my workload. I know it's been said before, but I'm going to emphasize here that children take a lot of work! It's weekends like this one that bring that message home. It's the best work in the world though, and I had a blast. Needless to say, I wouldn't change a thing. Except maybe my noisy neighbours who have kept me up all week.
Mostly unrelated but still relevant: Check it out! I'm on TV!
http://www.chextv.com/news/ln/13-04-19/Cloth_diapers_vs_Disposables.aspx
Wednesday, 17 April 2013
Messy Boys
I know not everyone will agree with me on this, but I believe boys are supposed to be messy. What does a 6-year old boy need with a hair brush anyway? I am guilty of taking my boys out with food on their shirts and faces. Oops. It doesn't bother me though because there are far more important thigns to focus on, like having fun and being nice to people.
That's not to say I go overboard. I do clean my children. There is a hand wipe and face swipe after every meal and snack. They have their bath/shower every other day (it can't be every day due to dry skin) and they always wash their hands before eating or after hygienic rituals. That said, there always seems to be food somewhere on their little persons.
I think it's all about balance. I'm not going to let E go out with a donut stuck to his nose or anything (as if he'd leave it there), but I'm not going to spend a significant part of each day making sure he's immaculate either. He's a boy. He's a magnet for food, dirt and anything sticky. As long as he's mostly clean at the end of the day, I'm not too worried about it. J's pretty good at keeping his face clean, if not his clothes, so this is mostly about the toddler. J will get dirty outside though.....
I know there are parents out there who can't stand messy faces, but I've never had someone tell me E's too messy. He's so cute and happy that most people never notice the ketchup on his chin. If anyone can pull it off, he can. Besides, look at that face! Isn't it just begging for sloppy food?
That's not to say I go overboard. I do clean my children. There is a hand wipe and face swipe after every meal and snack. They have their bath/shower every other day (it can't be every day due to dry skin) and they always wash their hands before eating or after hygienic rituals. That said, there always seems to be food somewhere on their little persons.
I think it's all about balance. I'm not going to let E go out with a donut stuck to his nose or anything (as if he'd leave it there), but I'm not going to spend a significant part of each day making sure he's immaculate either. He's a boy. He's a magnet for food, dirt and anything sticky. As long as he's mostly clean at the end of the day, I'm not too worried about it. J's pretty good at keeping his face clean, if not his clothes, so this is mostly about the toddler. J will get dirty outside though.....
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